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Suggested
Rating: for teen and
older readers
Category: Daniel/Janet friendship
Setting: following the events of Singularity
Synopsis: Janet becomes a mom, Daniel becomes an
uncle
Author’s
Comments: Part 5 in The Journey series. A word of thanks has to go to Isabelle
– some of the musings from one of our conversations have definitely
influenced this piece. And my
appreciations to Sonia, faithful editor, for helping me make this better.
DISCLAIMER: All
publicly recognizable characters and places (the Stargate SG-1 stuff)
are the property of MGM, World Gekko Corp and Double Secret Productions. This piece of fan fiction was created
for entertainment only and no infringement on copyrights or trademarks was
intended. Previously unrecognized
characters and places, and this story, are copyrighted to the author. Any similarity to real persons, living
or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.
BECOMING FAMILY
- by
Michelle Lunsford (February 2005)
“And
so she said, in this really raspy voice, over
my dead body!”
Daniel
blinked at Jack across the table.
His friend’s decidedly goofy grin was slowly giving way to a
grimace of exasperation.
“See,
she was a zombie, and she said…” The colonel inclined his head
expectantly.
Several
heartbeats of silence ensued in which Daniel blinked again.
“You
guys have absolutely no
appreciation for the finer points of cheesy B-movies,” O’Neill
finally huffed, shoving a bite of Jell-O in his mouth.
Daniel
merely shrugged and reached for a French fry. The pun was too obvious to be amusing,
and Jack’s haphazard attempt to explain the film’s plot
hadn’t exactly been compelling.
Suddenly
Teal’c spoke, his tone rather grave. “I do not understand the
relationship between cheese and B-movies, O’Neill. You have loaned me several of these
films from your collection, and yet I have not observed cheese in any of
them.”
“It’s
an expression, Teal’c,” Carter replied. Her smile was clearly amused and her
eyes shifted toward the colonel as she went on, “It typically implies
that something is of inferior quality, or that it’s
disreputable.”
“Or
at best,” Daniel interjected, “that it’s very, very
silly.”
“Ah
yes, but it’s the cheesiness that, in fact, makes B-movies so
great.” O’Neill
brandished his spoon for emphasis.
Daniel
noted that Sam rolled her eyes and Teal’c responded with one stoically
raised eyebrow. He was just
contemplating whether or not to try for some witty rejoinder when a new voice
interrupted from his right.
“Hey
guys, is it alright if I join you?” Doctor Fraiser, lunch tray in hand,
smiled down at the party gathered around the table.
“Please
do,” Daniel answered, gesturing at the empty seat across from him. “We need someone to save us from
Jack’s waxing eloquent about the virtues of B-movies.”
“I
see,” Janet replied as she sat down. “In that case, I’ll just
jump right in with the news I have to tell.”
“Ooh,
is it gossip?” O’Neill queried, rubbing his hands together
expectantly as he slid over to make a little more room for the doctor.
“Sorry
to disappoint you Colonel,” she said, grinning in response, “but
this is just plain ole information.”
Sam
leaned forward slightly.
“So, what’s the news?”
They all
waited as Janet took a deep breath and slowly released it. “I’ve decided to adopt
Cassandra.”
A chorus
of congratulations immediately broke out around the table.
“I
know it’s only been a couple of weeks,” Janet continued, taking a
sip from her water, “but it seemed like the search for suitable
candidates – those with the right security clearance, and who were
genuinely interested in adopting someone her age – was stretching out
longer and longer and all the while poor Cassandra is left waiting and
wondering…”
Daniel
reflexively met her gaze as she paused.
He’d felt the stirrings of a vague discomfort at her words, but
it was minor enough that he dismissed it.
Janet
shrugged, her eyes falling on each of them in turn as she said, “I may
not be the best choice for a parent, but I’m willing to work at
it. And… well, I’m
afraid I have grown rather fond of
Cassandra while she’s been in my care the past several days.”
“And
I know she adores you, Janet.”
Sam reached across the table and gave her friend’s hand a quick
squeeze. “Whenever I come
to visit, or take her out for a few hours she just raves about you.”
O’Neill
nodded in agreement. “And
who says you’re not the best choice for a parent? I think you’ll make a fantastic
mom!” He waggled a finger
at the group seated around the table as he went on, “You’ve
already proven how well you can take care of this crazy lot – me
included.”
“Indeed,”
Teal’c added.
“Cassandra could not do better that to be placed under your care
and guidance, Doctor Frasier.”
Daniel
wanted to add his own praise and declaration of his faith in her, but he
noticed her cheeks were already beginning to glow with a hint of pink, so he
simply met her eyes and smiled, nodding in affirmation.
Janet
swallowed more of her water, and when she spoke her voice was softer than
normal. “Thank you –
that really means a lot to me.”
She took another drink before placing her glass on the table. “And it’s also reassuring
to hear you have so much confidence in me, because… well, because I
want to ask you all a favor.”
“What?”
Daniel immediately answered.
“Each
of you has already been so supportive of Cassandra,” she began,
“and you’ve gone above and beyond to help take care of her. If the adoption is approved,
I’ll be accepting full responsibility for her, of course. And I don’t mind that –
it’s truly what I want to do.
But…”
Daniel
was pretty certain he’d guessed what she was going to ask, and knew he
was going to answer in the affirmative.
Not only did he consider Janet to be a good friend, but he’d
grown rather attached to Cassandra himself. But, preferring not to second guess
her, he waited before giving any reply.
“You
don’t have to give me an answer right now,” Janet said. “But I wanted to ask each of you
to continue to be a part of Cassandra’s life. To be… I guess to be sort of
like unofficial uncles and an aunt, as it were.”
“Well
I can give you my answer right
now,” Sam quickly piped up from her end of the table, “because if
you even think for one minute you can get rid of me that easily, Doctor
Frasier…”
To some
outsider the words might have sounded harsh, but Daniel saw his friend was
smiling broadly as she gave her mock threat. “The same goes for me,” he
said, glancing at Janet as he offered a smile of his own.
“I
always wanted to be an uncle,” O’Neill commented. “And of course Teal’c will
want to get in on the fun, won’t ya, Big Guy?”
“Indeed,”
he replied, inclining his head in a gesture of respect.
Janet
suddenly bit at her bottom lip, averting her gaze as if hesitant to make eye
contact. For a moment, Daniel was
almost certain he detected a hint of tears glistening in her eyes, but then
she quickly regained composure.
Breathing
a relieved sigh, Janet said, “I don’t know why I was so worried
about asking all of you. I should
have known you’d all say yes.
And again, this really does mean a lot to me.” She paused, fixing her eyes on the
gentlemen of the party.
“And while I do believe a single parent can provide a good home,
I also know it’s important for Cassandra to have positive male role
models in her life. So…
thank you. Thank all of you.”
A
momentary silence settled as Janet slowly turned her attention to her lunch.
“Well,
I hate to leave good company,” O’Neill announced, “but
there’s a certain report that, if not turned in to the general by
fourteen hundred, will get me called in for one heck of a dressing
down.” He stood. “So, if you’ll excuse
me…”
Sam began
to ease her chair back from the table as the colonel exited. “Afraid I need to go as
well. I’ve been itching to
study the equipment SG-2 brought back from their last mission, and it was
delivered to my lab right before I came to lunch.”
“Certainly
don’t want to keep that alien technology waiting,” Janet quipped,
smiling at her friend.
“See
you guys around.” Sam
paused as she walked by the end of the table. “And congratulations again,
Janet.” She gave the doctor
an affectionate pat on the shoulder before ambling off.
“So,
are you two going to abandon me as well?” Janet teased as she took a
bite of fruit.
Teal’c’s
expression was genuinely remorseful as he replied, “I apologize Doctor
Frasier, but I am scheduled to assist Major Castleman in a combat training
exercise at fourteen-thirty. I
should engage in a brief session of kel’no’reem, so that I will
be at my best for this endeavor.”
“Oh,
don’t worry Teal’c, it’s fine, really,” she assured.
Daniel
noticed she glanced at him then, and he pointed at his lunch plate, still
half-full of French fries.
“Don’t worry – I’m not going anywhere just
yet,” he said.
“See,”
Janet directed her attention back to the Jaffa.
“Doctor Jackson will keep me company while we finish
eating.”
“Very
well,” Teal’c acquiesced as he stood to leave. “Enjoy your meal.”
Once they
were alone Daniel asked, “So, when will you get an official answer
about the adoption?”
“Hopefully
soon,” she replied.
“I actually filed the completed paperwork day before
yesterday. I was going to wait to say anything until I knew whether it had
been approved but,” she paused, a sheepish grin pulling at the corner
of her mouth, “I guess I just couldn’t keep it to myself.”
He nodded
as he reached for another fry.
“Have you told Cassandra?”
The grin
transposed into a frown.
“No, not yet. I keep
having arguments with myself about it.”
Daniel
pushed his glasses up as he met her gaze. “How so?”
Janet
paused as she finished a bite of her sandwich. “Well, part of me wants to tell
her because I know this infernal waiting is hard on her. On the other hand, I’d hate to
get her hopes up and then have the adoption not be approved.” Her fork stabbed at another piece of
fruit as she continued, “I mean, I feel pretty confident that
it’s going to be approved, but I have to consider the
possibility.”
“Right,”
Daniel murmured, suddenly losing what was left of his appetite. Now he knew what that earlier twinge
of discomfort had signaled. He
understood what she was saying and empathized with her, but this topic was
quickly bringing up images and emotions he’d just as soon not remember.
“I
suppose I’m choosing to err on the side of caution at this
point,” Janet went on, a little hesitantly, “because Cassandra
seems to be holding up pretty well…”
Getting a
sense that maybe his friend simply needed someone to listen to her regarding
all this, Daniel pushed his own feelings aside, crossed his arms and leaned
forward slightly to rest them on the table. “Well, that’s good to
hear.”
Janet
gave a quick nod, but didn’t meet his gaze, seeming to gather her
thoughts. “We have our good
and bad days, of course. And she
still has trouble sleeping sometimes – bad dreams, or I simply wake up
to hear her softly crying in her room down the hall…”
“She’s
a tough kid,” he encouraged.
Cassandra had convinced him of that when they’d first found
her. “She’ll get
through this.”
“I
know,” Janet whispered, and when she raised her face to look at him,
Daniel saw her eyes glistening with unshed tears. She took a steadying breath and
pressed on. “But when I go
to her, when I sit down on the bed beside her… even though she lets me
comfort her I can see it – I can see the disappointment in her eyes. She wants her mother, and I… I can never be that.”
He
reached out and gave her arm a reassuring squeeze. “No, you can’t. But you can be there for her. And, in the end, that’s all that
matters.”
“Is
it really?” she asked bluntly, her eyes searching his.
Even as
some part of his brain scrambled to warn him of the unpleasant consequences
of pressing this issue, Daniel steadily met that imploring gaze and answered,
“Yes, it is. Believe me, I know it is.”
The pain
in her eyes was slowly giving way to a surprised realization and he knew it
was too late to turn back.
Attempting to set his resolve he managed a small shrug and admitted,
“This is a scenario that I’m not entirely unfamiliar with.”
Janet
stared back at him, her expression reflecting a guarded curiosity. But she said nothing.
Daniel
took a deep breath and released it slowly. Leaning back in his seat he said,
“My parents died in an accident when I was eight.” His eyes fell away momentarily as a
flood of memories washed over him.
“The only other family I had was a grandfather, but… well,
it wasn’t exactly feasible for him to take me. So I spent the rest of my childhood in
foster homes.”
“I’m
so sorry, Daniel. I – I didn’t know.”
Her voice
was warm with compassion and Daniel found himself drawn back to meet her
gaze. She trusted you enough to share about her past, he thought,
recalling how she’d helped him get through the aftermath of
Hathor. Maybe you should do the same.
He eased
forward again, pushing his lunch tray to the side. But he kept his eyes on Janet,
managing to find strength for his resolve in her unquestioning gaze.
“There
were a few times, early on, when I thought it was possible I might be
adopted.” A little
surprised at the steadiness of his voice, Daniel continued, “and even
though I understood it wasn’t the same as having my real parents, there
was something that was so nice about feeling wanted.”
When he
didn’t go on, Janet softly asked, “But things didn’t work
out?”
He sighed
wearily as he nodded. “You
know how it works. Adoptive
parents typically want younger children.
And I wasn’t exactly an average
case.” Reflexively his
fingers toyed with the edge of one of his sleeves as his voice grew
quiet. “I’d traveled
with my parents most of my life, and while they did provide me with an
excellent education, I wasn’t exactly accustomed to the way things
worked in public school systems.
Plus, I had unusual interests.
And because of my aptitude scores I’d been labeled gifted, which
only served in further isolating me...”
He
hesitated. Despite the painful
memories this was bringing forth, he also felt uncomfortable talking this
openly about his abilities. He
always had. How many times did I wish to just be like one of the normal kids?
his inner voice reminisced.
Janet
offered a tiny smile as she said, “So while other boys were out playing
baseball and pulling little girls’ ponytails, you were holed up
somewhere with a book about ancient cultures?”
His eyes
locked with hers, a revelation suddenly unfolding in his mind. Even
with her gentle teasing she makes me feel safe. Finding that he could even offer a
hint of smile in return, Daniel answered aloud, “Yeah, something like
that.” He waited a couple
of heartbeats before pressing on.
“Anyway, I never was adopted. But the point I wanted to make was
that even in the midst of all that, and all the other disappointment and
pain… my foster parents did love me, in their own way. I knew it wasn’t the same as
having my own mom and dad, but it did make a difference. For those times when my foster parents
really were there for me, it was important – it mattered.”
Janet
held his gaze for several seconds before finally nodding. “I think I understand. And thank you. I appreciate you being so open with
me, especially about something that I know must be difficult for you to talk
about.” She reached out and
gently rested her hand on his arm.
“But I think I really needed to hear something like that.”
She
withdrew her hand and their conversation began to turn toward lighter
matters. He sat with her while
she finished the remainder of her lunch, making friendly small talk, and then
accompanied her as they walked to the elevator. After Janet departed on level 21 and
Daniel continued up to his lab, he couldn’t help noting how cathartic
it had been to actually talk to her about his childhood. What
was it Mom used to always say? he asked himself, as he stepped off on
level 18. When you help someone else, you also help yourself. And as he made his way down the
corridor, a new idea began to take shape.
^ * ^ * ^ * ^ * ^ * ^ * ^ * ^ *
Daniel
leaned back in his chair, eased off his glasses, and rubbed his tired
eyes. He’d come in early
that morning to get a head start on a new piece of translation that had been
delivered to his lab just before he’d left base the Friday before. He’d made good progress but was
beginning to feel the need for a break.
Repositioning his spectacles he considered, maybe it’s time for a second cup of coffee. Then, reaching for his empty mug, he
amended, or would that be my third?
A light
knock interrupted his musings and he glanced up to find Doctor Frasier
standing in the doorway.
“Good
morning,” she said, cheerfully.
“Morning,”
he replied. He was a little
surprised to see her. She’d
never come to his lab before.
She
glanced around the room, but seemed hesitant to actually enter. “I hope I’m not disturbing
you.”
“Not
at all,” he answered, waving her inside. “I was just about to take a
break and pour myself some coffee.
Would you like some? I
think I’ve got another mug around here somewhere…” He stood and began a search among the
piles of papers and books on his desk.
“No,
thank you,” she replied.
Daniel
looked up, noticing that as she finally stepped into his lab she cast another
quick look around, her eyes bright and alert. It was a gesture he’d seen her
make several times before, although typically it was in medical
situations. I wonder just how much she actually takes in when she does that?
Casually
crossing her arms, Janet off handedly commented, “So, this is Doctor
Jackson’s lab?”
Unsure
where this was going, Daniel stepped over to his coffee pot and refilled his
mug. “Home away from home,
you might say.” He turned
back to face her and found she was silently studying one of the masks he had
positioned among the bookshelves.
For a moment he considered launching into an explanation about it, but
she broke the silence first.
“I
wanted to talk to you, if you’ve got a moment?”
“Sure,”
he replied, feeling his curiosity intensify just a little more.
Taking
his seat again he motioned toward one of the other chairs. But Janet shook her head, her arms
relaxing to her sides as she approached his desk. “That’s okay, this will only
take a minute.”
He sipped
at his coffee and nodded for her to continue. He wasn’t sure what he expected
her to say, but it came as no surprise that she looked him squarely in the
eye and came straight to the point.
“Cassandra
told me that you two had a little talk.”
Suddenly
he felt a tiny knot begin to form in his stomach. His conversation with Janet several
days ago had given him the impression that perhaps talking to Cassandra
– sharing with her about his own experience of losing his parents and
being a foster child – might help her. He’d found the perfect
opportunity when SG-1 and a few others had been at Janet’s this past
weekend, celebrating the finalization of the adoption procedure. But, he belatedly realized, he
hadn’t exactly run his idea by Janet before he’d acted on it.
“Yes,”
he answered. “I hope I
wasn’t out of line to do so.
I mean, I know I should have asked you about it first--”
“No,
it’s okay,” Janet interrupted, placing a hand on his
shoulder. Smiling warmly she
added, “In fact, I wanted to come by and personally thank you.”
He felt
immensely relieved to know he hadn’t inadvertently upset her, but now
found himself puzzled as to why she was so appreciative. Gazing up at her he shrugged and said,
“Uh, you’re welcome.”
“I
don’t know everything you said to her, and I don’t need
to.” Her eyes shone with
undeniable feeling as she continued, “all I know is that whatever it
was, it definitely helped. I
can…” she paused, auburn tresses swishing at her shoulders as she
shook her head. “I’m
not sure how to say it other than I can see a change in her. It’s not anything stark, or
significant, but I can see
it.”
“Well,
I’m glad to hear that,” he answered sincerely. “But how do you know it was our
conversation that made the difference?”
“I
just know,” she replied, her smile broadening slightly as she gave his
shoulder a squeeze.
“Besides, one of the things Cassandra did share with me about
your talk was that she was so glad to find out she wasn’t the only person something like this had
ever happened to.”
Daniel
couldn’t help but smile, too, feeling more affirmed with each passing
second that his decision had been the right one.
“I
know that at times she feels so out of place, so – well, so alien, simply because of her
situation. Daniel, I can’t
tell you how much this means to me, to know she’s found a point of
connection with you. Thank you
– thank you so much.”
Feeling
his cheeks begin to warm with embarrassment from her open praise, he was
relieved when Janet gave his shoulder one final pat and then turned to
go. Watching her walk out of his
office, he pondered what had just happened.
So maybe you grew up an orphan and
no one ever adopted you – now you’ve got a niece, and a group of
friends who are becoming more and more like family every day.
There was
a time not so long ago, he further reflected, when the idea of getting close
enough to anyone to consider them family would have been unthinkable. He knew Sha’re, and his time
among the people of Abydos,
had done a lot to help change that.
He even suspected that the initial encounter with one Colonel Jack
O’Neill had been what set off the spark of that change.
And just maybe a certain petite,
yet feisty medical doctor is also playing a major role in all this?
Daniel
shook his head, wondering just how much truth was revealed in that
thought. Certainly he considered
the members of SG-1 to be his closest friends, but his growing friendship
with Janet was proving to be something… unique. Other than Sha’re, he
couldn’t remember ever feeling so comfortable just talking to
someone. And, despite only
knowing Janet for a few months, he strongly suspected there wasn’t
anything he couldn’t tell her.
He really did consider her as much a part of his family now as he did Jack, Sam, and Teal’c.
Not
entirely comfortable with the introspective route his thoughts were taking,
he turned back to the project on his desk. Yes, there were probably reasons why
his attitude in this particular area of his life was changing. And even though the prospect of such
changes still scared the hell out of him, Daniel had to admit he was glad it
was happening But such thoughts are better left for a
time when I don’t have quite so much translation to do, he reminded
himself. With another swig of
coffee, he picked up the next piece of text and got back to work.
~ FINIS ~
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